Tribute to Miss Whiplash

On November 30, 2005, the London Evening Standard newspaper published an article by Robert Mendick, entitled “Miss Whiplash, the Call Girls and Links to Animal Rights Militants”. The piece details a police investigation into links between one woman, Janet Lawrence, (also known as Miss Whiplash), and her fiscal and other support for both the Animal Liberation Front and the group known as Stop Huntingdon Animal Cruelty. Miss Whiplash allegedly was famous for her stereotypical dominatrix costumes and “services” that included whipping and trampling men in her “fully equipped large, discrete and private dungeon.” UK police believe that this “call girl” donated significant funds from her profession to both ALF and to SHAC.

IWMC offers you this Poem as a Tribute to Miss Whiplash:

Twas the month before Christmas
 in 2005
When Ms Whiplash was found
to be living two lives;
Now she’s paying for that, in a
jail cell for months and does she regret
that her clients were chumps?
Or does she miss
the odd things that she did?
In the name of saving
lab rats and guinea pigs?

For Ms Lawrence is Ms Whiplash
and her furtive plan
was to torture willing idiots
in order to hand
over pound after pound to ALF and to Shac;
Each of her victims wore his wounds on his back.
How ironic we find it
that this leathered lady who proclaims love for beasts
now uses depravity
against foolish men
and then makes them pay
with their pain and their pounds
so that she may
support cowardly demons
who constantly strive
to frighten, harass,
and worry the lives
of those who use animals
in an unending quest to save innocent people
through science without rest.

As Christmas draws near we can only hope
that UK officials have got all the dope
on Shac and on Alf, on call girls and torture,
their unholy nights
of arson and forfeiture
of kindness
and decent plans for the future.
May God bless us all in this
season of renewal.