"We’ve known for some years now that the take on green vegetables, especially those from the private garden, is unsustainable and that there should be a moratorium on commercial sales," Whatatwat said.

"Broccoli, Cabbage, Silver Beet and Peas in the Pod were endangered, especially in Great Britain around Sunday lunchtime," he said.

The three responsible organisations said they had worked for decades to save animals from sustainable utilisation and were now focussing their efforts on the last species to be saved – the common garden vegetable.

"People who eat these endangered vegetables should be hung, drawn and quartered," said an IFAW UK worker, who spoke on condition of anonymity.

"We place Vegetable eaters in the same category as those who want to eat fish or marine mammals or mutton, beef or pork – they’re all murderers," he told a press conference.

In true Greenpeace style, unflavoured muesli bars were passed to media and members of the public at the announcement of the survey results. "Those who blended green vegetables in a kitchen blender were the worst offenders. It’s absolute cruelty and should be stopped."

The survey was conducted in all commonwealth and non-commonwealth countries by Greenpeace members brainwashed by environmental rubbish and too young and ignorant to know better. They asked more than a billion people worldwide whether "Endangered Garden Vegetables Should Be Saved".

"We received 100 percent support for our stance on green vegetables, and therefore call on all politicians and like-minded nations worldwide to implement a moratorium on garden vegetables before the week is out," Whatatwat said.

Greenpeace said it would introduce a measure into UNSAV – the United Nations Save All Vegetables Committee – that would allow limited aboriginal subsistence harvesting on strict grounds, including DNA testing. "DNA testing would help stop illegal gardening, and ensure pro-vegetable-eating nations don’t illegally import peas or cabbages during the moratorium."